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RxMen: Comical Cures for Super-Symptoms

It’s easy to think of superheroes as larger than life demigods whose heroism makes them ideal specimens of humanity. However, delve deeper, and it’s quickly apparent that, powers and abilities aside, these characters are still (mostly) human. With that in mind, we started thinking about what comically exaggerated ailments might plague some of our favorite heroes, and how they might treat them (with some help from their local fictional pharmacy).

Once we came up with our list, we roped in a crusader of our own — the fittingly heroically named illustrator Ryan Quickfall — to bring these visions to retro-comic-book-style life.

A hunk of metal in the middle of your chest is guaranteed to cause some heartburn, and Tony Stark is likely long-immune to the effects of over-the-counter antacids. Armorol is heavy-duty enough to quell the fire; unfortunately, it won’t do much for his ego.

Bruce Banner has tried many ways to keep his Hulk side at bay, but has he ever taken a trip to California or Colorado for some medicinal Purple Smash? It should increase the likelihood that you won’t have to see him when he’s angry.

Mind control is no easy feat, so Professor X is bound to get a pretty bad headache every now and then. CerebreX can help to keep those symptoms at bay — although there is a known unfortunate side effect or two.

Sure, The Flash’s speedy superpowers are useful when it’s time to save the world, but the rest of the time, he could stand to sit still for a few minutes. Tortoisol should be taken with plenty of water, especially if you’ve just returned from a run around the world.

You don’t get to be the Dark Knight without spending a lot of time in the dark. Bruce Wayne has been through an awful lot, so it’s no surprise he has trouble sleeping at night — but without proper rest, there’s no way to keep your wits so razor sharp.

Copy/concepts: Dan Reiss, Doug Levy, Jordan Roland, Eric Sams, and Sarah Maloy

Check out all the Shutterstock assets used in these illustrations in our RxMen lightbox »

What other super-heroes do you think could use a little help for a power-induced problem? What would you prescribe? Let us know in the comments. (Bonus points for creative brand names!)

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